"Well now," rasps the ancient dryad half-embedded in the root-wall, his voice crackling as old bark falls from his lips, "my intentions will depend a bit on your own, young man. Tell me truthfully who you are and why you are here in the tomb of the Great Nidhogg." He hasn't moved more than his lips so far, as he'd have to pry his limbs free of the wall to do more.

"I was asked by Azrael the Reaper to obtain a pot with the picture of a dragon on it from an area near the sacred spring. He would not tell me what was in the pot and got agitated when I kept asking about it. Nothing so simple can ever be that simple," Alptraum answers truthfully. "I have no idea why he even wants it. His claim was he wanted to learn what was in it, but my trust on his truthfulness is limited. I am helping him because I need his help in restoring a damaged heart from a dead Shadow Dragon." The bat then pats the pouch tied to his hip. "Which I still need to purify in the spring outside."

"That explains the why," the Guardian says, his eyes glowing green now along with the roots. "And now, the who?"

"Me? My name is Alptraum Reisender. I'm the Barsunala by birth and an agent of Draco County by choice," Alptraum answers. "My quest is all to aid Draco County ultimately."

"And?" the wooden man asks. "There is more you are not saying, but you smell… familiar."

"I'm the jailor of Vorgulremik, if that is what you smell. A great dragon from another world that my friends and I defeated. I did not think that would be anything important to you, since he' is not of this world," Alptraum continues and even raises his arm and taps the embedded dagger for emphasis. "I'm also bound with the power of the former Shadow of Amena, hence this 'suit' of shadow that protects me. The heart I seek to repair was its." The Eeee then pauses and scratches at his cheek. "I'm a lot when I actually spell it all out. I never realized that before," he admits.

"That is the familiar flavor," the Guardian says, and with a wood-splitting wrench, manages to get one branch-like arm extended, palm up and twig-fingers spread. "The heart… I must feel it… "

"Vorgulremik or the Shadow Dragon?" Alptraum asks as he carefully extracts the damaged heart from its pouch with his left hand, then offers it to the Guardian.

The Guardian clutches the crystal to his chest, and then sniffs at it with his knot of a nose (although how it can actually smell anything is a mystery). "The taint is there. Just as with the Striker in the Dark, it tastes of Her… " It looks back to Alptraum, and asks, "You do not taste of Her though, Barsunala. And it has been a long time since a dragon-slayer walked this land, even if you have one foot in the spirit world and wear dragons as adornment. And I see why you need a jar, too." The dryad offers the crystal heart back to the bat.

"Yes, the demon of Aztepa killed the dragon and enslaved it to her will; I witnessed his last moments of life," Alptraum says as he takes the crystal back and puts it away in its pouch. "And please forgive the questions I'm about to ask as I'm terribly curious … what is the Striker in the Dark? And why do you think I need a jar? I really only came for one for Azrael. Do you sense further need?"

"Ah, the Striker was Nidhogg," the Guardian says, sweeping his one free arm around the chamber. "Amena's first dragon servant in these lands. Here it came to grow fat, until the horned hero slew it. His organs are kept here, in these jars, and this shrine was built atop his bones. The Mother Tree grew here, feeding on Nidhogg's remains. And you need those remains to heal your crystal heart."

"All of them?" Alptraum asks as he turns to look at the numerous jars. "And if all … would that not kill this tree?"

"You need only a small bit," the Guardian claims. "A gallbladder, or a bit of liver perhaps. All that matters is that it is dragon flesh, or your Azrael would have been more specific."

"Why would he not simply tell me this, then? And why did he insist that I do not open the jar?" Alptraum asks and looks back over his shoulder. "And tell me of this Nidhogg? Was it too a shadow dragon? Or … something else?"

"It was a monster of legend," the Guardian says, waving his arm like a serpent. "A devil of the snake men – their dark god, given form. The spotted ones drove it off, and would have killed it – but the Dark Lady saved it, and brought it here."

"A long time ago, indeed," Alptraum says and nods, "So … it was a chiga, I believe they are called." He turns back to face the dryad. "Why are you here?" he asks, "Were you part of the power that slew it?"

"I am part of the Mother Tree, from which the dryads were born," the Guardian says. "These tales are from the memories of Nidhogg, sucked from his brain by the all-reaching roots of the tree. As for what slew the dragon-serpent, it was a unicorn."

"The Shadow Dragons had many issues with the unicorn creatures as well," Alptraum says, "Natural enmity, I suppose." The bat turns again and kneels beside the skeletons. "Who were these skeletons?" he asks.

"Tomb robbers," the Guardian says. "Or lost souls. None were innocent, for to come here they must have forced a Pure One to lead them." After saying that, it pointedly asks, "And how did you find this place?"

"I forced no-one. I helped a Shrine Maiden bring a sick woman here to be cured in the spring. She asked me to help," Alptraum points out. "And she knew of my quest to heal the heart and that I was searching for a bottle with the mark of a dragon on it."

"Hmmm," the tree-man goes. "The question now is should I let you leave with what you need, or protect the treasure. What is the purpose of repairing the heart of a dead Shadow Dragon?"

"To replace the fractured heart of another Shadow Dragon, the one bound to service of Draco County and gifts its rulers with extended lifespan and protection," Alptraum answers with complete honesty, "The one bound to the woman I love. I am here for her."

The Guardian goes quiet, resting its hand against its chest and closing its eyes in thought. "There must be compensation," it finally replies. "You must give of yourself in equal value to what you would take. Give to the Tree."

"What would be considered equal value, then?" Alptraum asks, his voice held in a neutral tone.

"Blood and spirit," the Guardian says, and moves his hand to point at Alptraum's armored right hand. "You hold life in that hand. And blood in the other. Some of each should do."

Alptraum nods at that. "Your requirement is agreeable," the Eeee says. "Where do I offer this gift? And … the blood of my right hand is not agreeable, is it?"

"A taste first," the Guardian says, gesturing for Alptraum to step closer. "It smells mixed. The Tree thrives on dragon blood, however."

Alptraum steps forward to the Guardian. He then holds out both hands, palms up, to the dryad.

With another wood-splitting effort, the Guardian's other arm comes free. He takes Alptraum's hands in his, and his fingers curl in towards the palm. Branching shoots and twigs, they painfully dig into the left palm, and somewhat less painfully pierce the right as well.

Alptraum grits his teeth. He's used to some pain and this is less than other moments in his life, fortunately. He also can't help but watch to see just what the Guardian inserts under the skin and how far it goes.

There's no telling what's going on under the skin by looking, but it feels like having the worst sliver ever. When the Guardian actually begins drawing blood, it is not like being fed on by a vampire. Alptraum feels like he's being spread out across the room, only dimly aware of his own body.

Alptraum's eyes may be wide and wobbly from the sensations of being spread out over the room. In this state he's not quite sure what to think, of if he is thinking. So … he tries to feel where he is. Perhaps what he is.

The bat feels the breeze against his wings, and the river flowing across his toes, and his ears piercing the overcast to reach the sun. He is hard, yet yielding, and heavy as a mountain. All over him, his skin splits and branches and grows pods that will one day become dryads. He can feel some of them stir, seeds ready to drop.

Alptraum briefly wonders why he isn't terrified, but even that thought is soon gone. There is peace in this state, feeling as if part of life and the world that he has long traveled, but only been partially aware of. Creating life, helping it grow, watching the world change around him. It is an odd sort of contentment he has never known.

In this moment, time is meaningless. He's been there forever, will continue to be there forever. Until he feels himself shrinking, shriveling… collapsing back into his tiny body. His right arm throbs in hunger, and he feels dizzy from loss of blood. The shadow cloak is gone, leaving him exposed, and his toe-talons are dug so deeply into the wood of the floor that he can't even move his legs yet. The Guardian lets him go.

"Ugh," Alptraum says as he wobbles in place, his toes firmly locked in 'sleep' mode so that they will not easily come free. He flexes both hand slowly as he blinks, trying to get his senses to return enough and then get a look at just how badly the tree injured him. "It feels like you took a lot," the Eeee says weakly.

His left hand looks slightly bruised, but isn't bleeding. His right… Well, it looks dead, but uninjured. The orb isn't even glowing as brightly as the dim phosphorescence that bathes the chamber.

"You may take that jar," the Guardian says, pointing to the smallest (and thus easiest to carry) of the jars. It still looks heavy though, given the bat's weakened state.

Alptraum tries to flex his right hand, testing how much movement is left in the withered limb. "I cannot summon my cloak now," he admits, "It will be hard for me to leave."

"Rest," the Guardian says. "You are not alone. Even now, someone approaches."

Alptraum looks towards the door as he weakly sits down on the floor. "Do you have something I can encase my hand with?" he asks and holds out his right. "In this state it is a danger to others. It may try to devour even a friend."

"Only wood and moss," the ancient dryad says, just before the familiar, if wet, form of Snow walks into the chamber. Her white skin takes on green sheen from the light. "Alptraum, are you okay in here? It's been hours… "

"I've been better," Alptraum admits as he continues to flex and curl the fingers of his right hand. "The tree required payment for me to take a jar, and payment has been rendered. It cost me."

The Shrine Maiden comes right up and hugs Alptraum to her. "I can see that, you look weak as a newborn," she says. She grabs onto the back of his right hand and holds it behind his back, then puts her other hand to back of his head and pushes his muzzle to her neck. "Drink something," she tells him.

"I'm not sure that is a good idea," Alptraum says slowly and weakly. "You may end up as weak as I am right now. My body conditions should not be your burden too."

"I can't have you dropping dead either," Snow notes. "I won't let you drink too much, and you can hardly force the issue in your condition," she points out.

"I look that bad?" Alptraum actually asks. His eyes wince closed and then open several times in a pointless attempt to push away the weariness. "At least promise me you will tie my right hand where it now is until we are from this place and it can be fed," the Eeee asks, just before his jaws part and he actually bites down on Snow's neck.

The blood is warm and refreshing, and really underlines just how hungry Alptraum is. But Snow is good to her word and doesn't let him drink her into weakness herself, and the bat soon finds himself with nothing left but to lick the blood from his lips. "Stay here," she tells him, and then leaves.

So, Alptraum sits back and licks his lips. "Were you trying to kill me?" he actually asks the dryad.

"No. You are not dead, are you?" the Guardian notes. He looks a little blurry, but that could just be a reflex from Alptraum having his toes dug in as if he were hanging for sleep.

Alptraum finally forces his feet to release. "I was close, though," the bat points out, then just shrugs. While he waits for Snow to return, he pulls his right hand around to see if drinking blood helped it any at all, or if it still looks pretty bad.

It looks pretty bad. Just like when he first discovered that it needed to be fed, in fact. A scene that tends to replay itself in his nightmares. After a few minutes, he hears motion again in the overgrown corridor; it almost sounds like a struggle.

"One of these days I just know you'll grow an actual mouth, or worse," Alptraum tells the withered flesh of his palm. His attention, though, is quickly pulled towards the corridor and what sounds like a struggle. His ears flick towards it and the Eeee then tries to get to his feet.

With a grunt, something is thrown into the room and flops about. It's nearly four feet long and covered in slime, with an armored head, flat black eyes and a huge mouth surrounded by tiny tentacles. "And I thought the worms were bad," Snow complains, standing in the entrance and dripping with mud and slime.

"What is that?" Alptraum asks as he peers at the freaky-looking thing. The Eeee reaches for it with his right hand, assuming she meant it for him to … eat.

"Mug-guzzler," Snow explains, as Alptraum's right hand lunges as he reaches out. Soon enough it's a shriveled thing, with only the bony head retaining any shape. "Lucky for you, mug-guzzlers need love too. How many more do you need?"

"At least four or five more," Alptraum admits, grateful his hand feels less, well, dead now.

The Eeee blinks and asks, "Don't tell me that you and it actually, ah, mated?"

"It's a fish," Snow points out. "They just… spray… " She shudders a bit, and then says, "I'm really going to need a good bath after this. Can you walk enough to come outside, so I don't have to drag the slimy monsters over to you?"

"I'll help you bathe, you know," Alptraum points out as he struggles to his feet and collects the indicated jar. He looks to where the dryad was and says, "Thank you."

It's slow and difficult, but Alptraum manages to leave the chamber with the jar in tow. "I just hope you don't want a tongue bath this time," he says with a tired grin to Snow as he joins her.

"We'll see… you need to recover a bit more first," Snow says. Back in the pool chamber, Alptraum can see another human girl lying asleep on the side, the fairy lace finally gone from her. She doesn't look to be in much better shape than Alptraum though.

"She looks a little better," Alptraum says as he looks towards the human girl. He drags the pot over to her and sets it down, then sits down beside her near the glowing water. The Eeee then can't help but reach out and dip a toe-claw into the green water.

It feels like dipping a toe into molten lead.

"Ow!" Alptraum yelps and jerks his toe back and grabs painfully at his foot. As he worriedly looks at his toe, he asks, "Why did that hurt me?"

"Because you're possessed by the Barsunala, of course," Snow points out. "It's the pool of purification – it will try to purify that too."

"What about my right hand? Bad idea?" Alptraum asks. It's not possessed by the Barsunala, after all.

"Ummm, if it were me, I wouldn't try it," Snow admits, and then holds out a hand. "Come on, you need to stand in the river with me."

"Okay, I'll clean the heart afterward," Alptraum says as he takes snow's hand and gets back up to follow her.

The girl leads him waist deep out into the river outside, which is unpleasantly cold – thankfully! Otherwise Alptraum would be reacting to Snow's 'fishing lure' aura, which is strong enough to attract bottom-dwelling slime fish, after all. At least he's able to grab them before the reach her now.

"I think things inverted it's so cold," Alptraum mutters as he shivers (and shrinks!) from the cold water. There he remains, grabbing and absorbing fish (now completely instead of the withering way), one after the other until the orb on the back of his hand returns to its 'normal' glow state.

"All full?" Snow asks, as she smacks an amorous fish away.

Alptraum playfully wiggles his fingers. "I think so," he says and to test it, tries restoring his full-body shadow cloak to stave off some of the cold.

The cloak spreads out, and he warms as it acts as a wetsuit. "Good, help me carry one of these back inside," Snow says. "I need to cook it up for me and Hester."

Alptraum grabs at the fish and after a bit of a struggle, restrains it by means of a shadow-cloak tentacle grip. As he makes his way back to the chamber, he actually asks, "Why don't I scare you, Snow? You just saw me eat things completely and you don't even flinch. I know you were trained to deal with monsters, but … I'm just surprised that as disturbing as I am, well… "

"Because you're good," Snow says. "I'd know if you meant any malice - I'm an empath, remember?"

"I guess so," Alptraum says as they return to the pool chamber. He now has the issue of how to purify the heart. The Eeee ponders how as he sets the fish down near the sleeping human. "I suppose I can just dip the pouch," he decides.

"Just give it to me, and I'll take it in," Snow offers, kneeling next to the fish and smacking it with a rock until it stops moving.

Alptraum actually tries to dip the pouch by its string first. "I want to try myself," he admits, "My quest. If this doesn't work, you can take it in. I can watch the fish."

"How will you know if it works?" Snow asks, hands on hips.

"I can examine the heart afterward?" Alptraum offers and grins. "All right, all right, you can take it in." He draws the pouch back out and offers it to her.

Snow takes it, and removes the crystal. "The pouch would have blocked the water," she remarks, and carries the heart into the pool. She waits until she's in the center before letting it touch the water there, where it seems to cause bubbling as it's slowly lowered.

"You make it seem so easy," Alptraum says as he watches the woman work (and how nicely parts of her bob in the water… ) "And truthfully, being here makes me feel more uncomfortable; it makes me feel wrong somehow. Being burned by purity and all."

"Well, I didn't burn you did I?" Snow asks, giving Alptraum a sweet, innocent and completely fake look.

"Yes, but you're not exactly pure anymore," Alptraum says with a wide, fangy, grin. "You seem to,oh, enjoy monsters in very unpure ways… "

Just for that, Snow rubs the healing heart against her chest. "Why do you say that?" she asks.

"You actively encourage me to pillage your treasure," Alptraum says with an exaggerated waggle of his brow. "And I have to admit that humans are … odd to pillage!"

"You should have seen what I had to do to purify Hester," Snow says teasingly.

"What did you have to do?" Alptraum, of course, asks.

"Body contact is an important part of the process," is all the Shrine Maiden says, as she rubs the heart against her. "This could take a while, if you want to get some sleep."

"I'm enjoying watching you, though," Alptraum claims, though he does have to stifle a yawn. The Eeee shapes his shadow enough to make himself a pillow out of it and lays his head down upon it to just 'rest his eyes' a moment so he can keep watching. "Thank you for not treating me like a monster, Snow," Alptraum murmurs. "I really enjoy working with you; you're a good partner."

"You aren't so bad either, Nightmare," Snow says.

Exhaustion has a benefit, in that Alptraum fell asleep quickly. His dreams were… bizarre, to say the least. Snow seemed to be the focus of most of them, while Alptraum was making love to her as a wriggly fish, a giant, serpentine dragon… and as a tree, somehow. There were nagging voices throughout, as if someone where trying to talk to him but was being blocked. And that someone sounded like Vorgulremik most of the time. Before waking, the bat dreamed of being a tree again – growing in the sun, leaves rustling and whispering in the breeze, while a naked Snow climbed him and plucked ripe fruit from his branches. The juice would run down her chin and chest and she'd make happy noises. But it was ruined by the smell of fish for some reason, which was pulling him back into the waking world.

Alptraum's eyes creak open slowly as his senses are assaulted by the smell of fish. "Please tell me I haven't spouted leaves or bark anywhere?" he murmurs tiredly before he finally manages to sit up and rub a bit at his eyes.

"Well, I can't say you weren't entirely wood free while you slept," Snow replies from close by. As things come into focus, Alptraum can see a lot of fish bones, and notices he's wearing the pouch the heart was carried in as a codpiece. Snow is kneeling next to him, while the other girl is sitting with her back to him, still chowing down on a hunk of raw fish.

"Was this really necessary?" Alptraum asks as he pokes the placed pouch and makes a face at Snow. "Is the crystal okay?"

The girl holds the crystal up before Alptraum then. It's… well… crystal clear now, aside from the fine cracks that are still spread through it. "Right here," Snow says. "Are you feeling better, or are you still hungry?"

"And the pouch was for your own protection," the Shrine Maiden points out. "Hester might have jumped you after what she's been through."

"I feel okay. I probably shouldn't bite you again or you'll have lost too much blood," Alptraum says as he reaches out with his left hand to take the crystal and turn it slowly in his fingers to see if he feels anything from it. He also holds it up to the scar on his chest out of curiosity. "What is wrong with her jumping me?" Alptraum jokes.

There isn't any tingle this time from the heart. "You need to fix my bite mark still too," Snow points out. "And Hester is hardly in any shape for that. She needs lots of protein and water."

"Oh I can think of a way to get protein," Alptraum remarks with a worrying grin. The bat then laughs and pulls off the pouch and drops the heart back into it. "And maybe I should leave that bite mark to claim you as my property… " he teases.

"It will impact my work," Snow points out. "So you need to fix it if you expect to bite me again."

"You have no sense of humor some days," Alptraum mock-grumbles and puts his hand lightly on the human's neck to try and close the wound. While he focuses on that, the Eeee can't help but be a little mischievous … and tries to color-shift a small patch of skin on her neck from white to solid black … and in the shape of a bat. Just enough to last, oh, maybe an hour roughly before it fades back to its natural white.

Surprisingly, the mark begins to fade as soon as Alptraum takes his hand away! Perhaps there's some quality to Snow's skin that simply rejects pigmentation.

The other girl moans suddenly, and says, "I feel like throwing up."

Alptraum makes a face. "Even your skin is no fun," he complains and then lightly pokes the human. He leans to the side and addresses Hester now, "How are you … why do you feel like throwing up?""

Hester squeaks, and turns her head to look at Alptraum through tangled strands of hair. "I don't like raw fish," she explains.

"Why not … cook it?" Alptraum asks. "And what do you like?"

"You'll feel better once you have some clothes on and are back in the wagon," Snow says. "And we should go soon. It's already morning."

"Cook with what? Don't even have a knife," the girl notes. Then mutters, "Sweet potatoes. Roasted over a fire."

Alptraum looks down as his naked body and hrms softly. His brow furrows as he extrudes his shadow-cloak again. This time he shapes it to make him look smooth in certain areas to avoid embarrassing Hester too much by any overt, uh, maleness.

"Already saw it," Hester says, once she notes where Alptraum's efforts are going. "How do you do that? Oil?"

Alptraum continues the effort anyway. "Magic, sort of," comes his answer. "A skill learned from a long dead creature."

"Uh-huh," the girl notes. "Your boyfriend is weird, Toadstool. I'm ready to go. It's okay to pee in the river, right?"

"I'm not her boyfriend," Alptraum points out.

"You aren't?" Snow asks, looking surprised.

"I am?" Alptraum asks Snow. "I'm your friend and male … but I didn't think you considered me, well, more than that?"

"Well… you are the only lover I've ever had," Snow points out.

This causes Hester to wince and say, "Please, don't mention sex. I am so sore and… just please don't."

"I won't mention that Snow is very good at it and … "Alptraum says with an amused grin. He then lightly nudges Snow with his elbow and tells her, "Then I expect an earring." With a wink, he says, "Okay, let's head back. Another delightful trip through cold water."

It is in fact not delightful, since now they're going against the current and need to hang on to one another. They reach the boulder though eventually, shake off the mud from between their toes and get dressed. The bundle Snow brought turns out to be a set of Hester's own clothing. With her hood up, Snow urges, "Let's hurry. The path is shaded, but I don't like being out during the day."

"If it gets to be a problem, I can cloak and just carry you," Alptraum says as he dresses quickly. He goes to remove the dagger buried his now cool hand.

"That is gross," Snow says, recoiling a bit as the various tubes and connections pull free from the dagger. "Ewww. Can you feel that?" she asks.

"Nope, I can't feel it at all outside of some tugging," Alptraum tells the human with a grin. "The dagger does bond with me, literally. It becomes part of my flesh. So … now I gross you out?"

"Your dagger does," Snow admits, and shudders. She is fully composed by the time Hester returns from visiting the bushes though. "Oh man," the girl says. "It's so good to be able to do that again."

"You couldn't pee before?" Alptraum, the ever tactful, asks.

"No, I couldn't," Hester says, giving the bat a cross look.

"Let's get to the wagon," Snow requests.

"Why not?" Alptraum asks as he starts walking.

"Alptraum, it's a female thing," Snow explains. "Arousal makes certain things difficult. I'm sure it's similar with men."

"Oh, okay," Alptraum says, "I wasn't sure what effects the lace had, other than the obvious."

It isn't long before they reach the wagon, and the Dromodon stirs back awake. This time it's Snow's turn to ride in the back though, reminding Alptraum to watch out for bandits. As Hester sits next to him, she asks, "Is this a coffin-wagon?"

"Yes, it belongs to Snow. She hopes it keeps people from trying to rob her while she sleeps," Alptraum explains as he gets the Dromodon moving with a snap of the reins. "You rode in the back, in chains, when we brought you here."

"You didn't take advantage of me or anything, did you?" Hester asks, giving Alptraum an accusing glare. "I know about you vampires… "

"Of course I didn't," Alptraum remarks and gives Hester a sidelong glance. "What do you think you know about vampires?"

"They all think they're ladies men," Hester says, looking forward. "Even the women! Always leerin' and lustin' after me when I'm not looking, then pretending I ain't even there when I see 'em!"

"What are you talking about?" Alptraum asks the human. "What town?"

"Gromit, of course," the girl says. "What other town is there?"

"Plenty," Alptraum says as they continue on. "I've been to other continents, even. Most places are not like Gromit." He gives her another look, then notes, "And let me make something clear. I joke with people I call friends. Sometimes I flirt; it depends on the friend. If someone has made it clear they do not want the attention, I do not. I do not force myself on anyone. I am sorry you have had bad experiences with other vampires, you won't have it with me." His attention returns to the road and he snaps the reins to get the beast moving faster.

The Dromodon grunts, farts and picks up the pace a bit. "Are you saying I'm ugly?" Hester asks, looking at Alptraum. She even smiles at him, showing a few gaps. "I bet lots of vampires would want me! They're just … intimidated by my raw beauty and stuff."

Alptraum just sighs and continues onward. "Then ask one of the ones you believe looks at you sometime," he offers.

The girl frowns and turns back to watching the road. "That's silly. Girls don't ask guys out. Plus, I don't know any of their names," she says. Then adds, "But… I got the fairy lace. I figured if I was wearing that, they'd notice you know?"

"I don't know if I'm the right person to talk to about relationships and attraction," Alptraum says, "The Gods know mine are stranger than anything else in this world. What you're telling me is that you wanted more attention from them, then?"

"I deliver the potatoes," Hester says. "Every day. I go to all the taverns, and see them there. Hanging over the street, in the cafes and the shops… They all dress nice. And I'm healthy." She looks to Alptraum again and says, "You saw, right? I'm not scrawny! I'm full of blood!"

"So, you want a vampire lover," Alptraum concludes. He looks over at her and asks, "Why?"

"I didn't say that!" the girl retorts, crossing her arms. "I just want what they have. Sitting at the cafe, wearing nice clothes and all that. If they noticed me, they'd let me into their circle and give me all that, right? Even if only to have some human blood every so often?"

"Not necessarily," Alptraum admits. "And besides, trying to get things that way doesn't always work. Is that what you see when you look at me? Some well-off vampire?"

"Toadstool said you were a Reaper," Hester replies. "Reapers are poor, like me. So what do I have to offer if not my blood?" she asks.

"I'm more than just a Reaper, but it's not really important," Alptraum says, "As for what you have, I don't know. I don't really know you, other than your immediate resentment of me even though all I did was carry you an hour by cart, then through that water, and so on. Snow didn't do it alone. Nor do I get paid for any of it." The Eeee shrugs and shakes his head, "I can't say what you offer without even knowing you. At a guess, you have a strong personality and a fiery will. You might make a good guard or even knight some day. But … that's all just guessing." He looks at the human and asks her, "What is it that you want, exactly? Just nice clothes?"

"I… don't want to live in a hut all my life," Hester says. "Pulling up potatoes and selling them to people livin' better lives. It's not fair. Why can't I have all that too? I been bringing them potatoes since I was nine years old."

"Life isn't fair. I grew up as a gypsy, Hester. Seen a lot of bad things, was far poorer then than you are now," Alptraum says, "Traveled for a couple years, saw a lot of terrible things in other lands. Nearly died more times than I can count. Slept in snow-banks, old ruins, and worse. Came close to becoming evil more than once. Now I live in a castle. Never would have believed it if I was told that years ago." He tilts his head to look at Hester again and continues, "Ultimately I think it's about being willing to take a risk, even if there's no promise of a reward. I took risks for other people, stood up against things I believed wrong. In the end I think I made it out of the life I had simply because I tried. Instead of just bringing potatoes to sell, talk to some of them sometime. Ask them if there are jobs at their home you could do. Heck, offer to do laundry. Get to know them. Rarely will people just give you something; you need to make the first gesture. Offer."

"Maybe… ask if they need someone to cook the potatoes, you mean?" Hester asks shyly, a bit cowed by Alptraum's tale.

"I guess. What exactly do you want? I'm not sure I quite understand. At times you sound like you think vampires are attractive, the next you hate them," Alptraum says and shrugs as he keeps his eyes on the road ahead. "Do you want to be part of their household as a servant? Or something not as binding?"

"I just want to have a nice life, I guess," Hester admits, rubbing her knees for some reason. "I guess working in the town is the way to get that, right? I don't know a lot about how the town works. It's all so… " Here she pauses to wave her hands in the air, before coming up with, "Sophisticated!"

"Well, a nice life is relative. There's something to be said for having your own place, even if it is a hut, and general control of your life. There are always costs for things," Alptraum says. The bat displays a momentary impish grin, then reaches over and takes a hold of Hester's hand with his right one. "My current life cost me my hand, for example… "

"Wah?" the girl cries, and pokes at the chitin with her other hand. "But… what's there instead?"

Alptraum flips his hand over to show her the underside. "Okay, let me try another approach. What are you good at?" he asks.

"Potato farming!" Hester announces. "And I know what numbers are! And I can put my ankles behind my head ever since I had that accident pulling the plow."

"Well, besides from the fun possibilities of having someone that limber around," Alptraum remarks, "How are you as a cook?"

"My dad never barfed after I fed him," Hester claims. "I know how to make potato soap, and roast potatoes, and mashed, and herb-ed, and… candied! I know how to can sweet potatoes. And I make mean pie."

"Then have you considered starting a bakery that specializes in potato products? Maybe the innkeeper would allow you room to cook there for a small portion of the profits?" Alptraum suggests.

"I mean, it's probably a little better than being the pet human of a vampire," Alptraum teases and grins.

"Like, making potato bread and stuff?" Hester asks, giving Alptraum a sideways look. "What's that got to do with fortune telling though? I don't understand."

"Fortune telling? What?" Alptraum asks.

"Prophets tell the future," Hester explains. "Everyone knows that! Do you mean the innkeeper has one and I have to share it with him?"

Alptraum rubs his head. "Profit, not prophet," Alptraum explains, an even spells them out. "Profit means the money you have left after you subtract the cost of the stuff you use to make what you sell."

"Dirt and water are free," Hester notes, but seems to think it over. "Working the fields though is work, right? So when I sell the taters in town, I'm selling the work of pulling them up, is that it? And… uh… if I keep some and make things out of them, I can sell that for more than just the potatoes because there's more work in them?"

Alptraum almost explains further, then just shrugs. "Yes, exactly," he says, giving up. This woman is not the sharpest knife, no.

"I can make two pies a night," Hester claims. "That's… " she has to count on her fingers for a moment… "almost ten sweet potatoes. So I'd have to sell those pies for… uh… " Here, her mathematical skills reach their limit.

"What does one sweet potato cost?" Alptraum asks.

"A half-shekel to a shop, one shekel off the wagon," Hester notes.

"So one pie would probably be a fair price at fifteen shekels, then," Alptraum suggests, "The cost of the potatoes plus a bit more for the labor to make the pie."

"Okay, I'll make some pies to bring to market day along with the taters!" Hester says with a big smile. The she asks, "And then what? Do vampires like pie? They never buy the potatoes from me. Am I being snubbed?"

"Vampires can't eat anything solid," Alptraum says and gives Hester a sidelong glance. "So, you do want a vampiric boyfriend… "

"Eh, I don't want a boyfriend," Hester says, sniffing. "I want to be noticed. Dad says you catch children from boyfriends."

"Only if it was a human boyfriend. Eeee and humans can't have children together," Alptraum points out and grins.

"How come?" Hester asks, sounding suspicious.

"Not compatible in that way. Sure, they can engage in the act, but children won't happen," Alptraum says, "Snow isn't pregnant, is she?"

"She's a virgin though, like me," Hester says. "Everyone knows Shrine Maidens are virgins!"

"Ah … well, she's a virgin with humans," Alptraum explains, "But she's also a monster hunter and that required her to, ah, be intimate with a monster."

"What sort of monster?" Hester asks in a whisper, while looking back at the sleeping albino girl inside the wagon.

"Me," Alptraum answers.

"Wait… you're a monster?" Hester asks, her eyes going big as she scoots to the end of the bench (which isn't very far, given the narrowness of the wagon.

"I'm not an evil one," Alptraum points out and grins. "Remember I helped save your life?" he points out as he reaches over and tries to pull the human close.

"So… you could ravish me or something?" Hester asks as she's drawn back those extra few inches. "Why did you do that to Sister Toadstool? Do all vampires do that? Or just monsters? How do you tell if a vampire is also a monster, anyway? Isn't that what the Gallisians say?"

"She asked me to. I don't do that to people unless they ask," Alptraum says, sighs, and shakes his head.

"As for why I helped you, it's because you were hurt," Alptraum adds.

"Then why did you make it sound like she had no choice?" Hester says with a pout. "Men are always teasing me because they think I'm stupid."

"She had to do it to improve her skill at monster hunting. I didn't force her to do anything," Alptraum clarifies. "You really have this fixation on being ravished, don't you?"

"Dad said I have to be on guard against it all the time," Hester claims. "Because I'm so tasty or something. I don't know though, aside from the teasing you haven't tried to eat me or kiss me or anything. I guess because you're Toadstool's monster, right?"

"Well, you haven't asked me to," Alptraum points out and grins. "If you really want a vampire to take notice of you, just walk up to one and talk to him. Or her! I'm not sure if humans are gender concerned."

"Wait… there are girl vampires too?" Hester asks in disbelief. "But… they all wear pants!"

"Of course there are. Haven't you heard of the Countess of Draco County? She's a vampire," Alptraum points out and laughs.

"But… she's like a million miles away," Hester notes. "I only know the ones in Gromit. So how do you say hello to a vampire? Do I have to mention anything special about me?"

"Just … say hello? They're regular people too," Alptraum points out. He rubs his forehead, then offers, "Would you like me to introduce you to one? Would that help?"

"You know some?" Hester asks. "What happens after hello though? Do I have to drink blood? Are you positive they can't eat pie?"

"I am a vampire. Of course I know some," Alptraum says and groans, "And yes, I'm sure they can't eat pie." The Eeee seems to be getting a headache

"I mean, not at all?" Hester asks. "Not even just chew it and spit it out or something? Can you only taste blood?"

"Well, chewing and spitting it out is possible, yes," Alptraum agrees.

"Have you ever done that?" Hester asks. "Can you try some of my pie?"

"Yes, I've done it. Learn to make a blood pie and you'd be popular," Alptraum says, "And yes, I can try some."

"How do I know if a vampire is spitting it out because they liked it, and not because they didn't like it?" Hester asks next.

"They would tell you," Alptraum says.  "And would chew more," he adds.

The girl nods at this, and seems to go quite for a bit, just watching the road ahead. "Did you enjoy it?" she asks after a bit.

"Enjoy what?" Alptraum has to ask as he watches the road ahead.

"Toadstool," Hester clarifies.

"Quite a bit. Humans are interesting to be with in that way," Alptraum answers, "Very smooth, soft, and warm."

"Wait, what sorts have you been with that aren't like that?" Hester asks.

"Other Eeee, a dragon, a blob, and a Skreek," Alptraum answers. "You're rather curious… "

"Shouldn't I be curious?" Hester asks. "After all that the lace put me through… I just wonder if sex is actually pleasant or not. I guess I should ask Toadstool… "

"It is very pleasant and enjoyable with someone you trust," Alptraum says. "It's … a way of sharing with someone."

"Huh, I have to trust someone too then?" Hester asks. "I really need to make some friends then."

"It helps," Alptraum says and grins. "You don't trust Toadstool and myself?"

"Sure, for dealing with blood-sucking underwear and monsters and stuff," Hester admits cheerily. "Besides, I'm supposed to wait until my dad finds me a husband. That's how he met mom, after all, before she ran off with that red-haired guy who road a Drokar."

"You'll be happier if you find your own. Answer me this, do you want children?" Alptraum asks.

"Eventually," Hester says. "I can't do all the work myself forever after all."

"Well, I was going to suggest that you consider a boyfriend or husband who wasn't human if you didn't care," Alptraum says and shrugs. "It's not like you're entirely human, you know."

"W-what?" the girl asks, sounding surprised. "What do you mean I'm not entirely human? Am I gonna turn into a nightgown!?"

"I'm fairly certain that you're part dryad," Alptraum explains, "Which is why the lace bonded with you. May have been your grandmother, or even mother. Not precisely sure where in your family tree you have a, er, tree."

"But… you just said that humans can only have kids with other humans," Hester says.

"Well, when magic gets involved sometimes other things are possible. I could tell you for certain if you're part dryad or not," Alptraum says, "But you would have to trust me."

"What? How?" Hester asks. "Does it involve burying me in the dirt?"

"No, I ken you to see if your body doesn't feel quite human," Alptraum explains, "It's not sex, but it can be intimate."

"Uh… I don't understand that term," Hester notes, looking worried. "You can feel me and tell if I'm human? That… just doesn't sound right."

"Yes, I can. I told you before I'm not just an Eeee," Alptraum says and draws the wagon to a stop. "Do you want me to try? No pressure if you do not. It is only if you want to know for sure."

"I… don't need to know," Hester claims, hugging her shoulders. "I mean… I can grow potatoes. If you do that and I'm not part dryad, then there's nothing special about me. So, knowing one way or another doesn't have any… goodness… but not knowing lets me imagine what I want."

"Well, the fact the lace bonded to you is pretty telling that you are," Alptraum notes and snaps the reins to get the Dromodon moving again. "If you want my opinion, you are."

"And that's why I grow good potatoes," Hester claims, sitting up straighter. "So my potatoes are better, and so my pie is better because it's dryad pie and even vampires will like it, because how often does anyone offer them food and it'll be new and exciting and they'll gift me with nice clothes and smelly soaps… "

At that Alptraum just laughs. "I hope you're right," he says, "Now come on, let's get you home… "

"Yeah, onward!" Hester says, pointing down the road. "Hey, can you make soap out of potatoes? Maybe I should try that… "

"Does Gromit have a library?" Alptraum asks, "Books can tell you if you can make soap out of them and how… " Inwardly, Alptraum realizes that even though he grew up poor, at least all the traveling educated him some.

"What's a book?" Hester immediately asks.