Blasphemy in the Eyes of Cerridwen The wolves add Redmane to their pack.

The night passes all too quickly as Redmane sleeps on the rough floor of the old building. Without blankets, it makes for a moderately cold experience, though at some point she can find minor thanks in having a large wolf to curl against. At least he's warm. At daybreak, Redmane finds herself being prodded awake. "The council has decided your fate," barks a gruff voice. "Do not keep them waiting."

"No breakfast first?" the knight complains as she gets up and runs her fingers through her hair.

"You can share his breakfast," comes the reply ... right before there's a soft thump and Redmane can feel her bedmate wolf rock against her. Apparently, her wake-up guard decided to kick him. Thomas, for his part, merely grunts at being kicked, then pushes himself upright.

"You make it difficult to sympathize with your plight," Redmane grumbles at the guard. "Fine then, take me to the elders."

"When he is done eating. I think he would find it interesting to observe your fate," the guard comments. The scruffy wolf-man then turns and exits the room, bolting the door behind him.

"It's hard to take them seriously when they don't wear pants," Redmane notes to Thomas.

Thomas is now nosing a ragged set of ribs from some large animal, probably a deer. It looks very raw and bloody. "It's hard to wear pants when you shift between two forms," the wolf snorts.

"Kilts," Redmane suggests. "They are often favored by violent, hairy men anyway. It's no wonder they can't maintain their city any more, lacking pockets."

"Do you want any?" Thomas asks by nosing the carcass towards Redmane.

The woman winces at the sight of the raw meat. "I haven't eaten since before I arrived at Lunafell," she admits. "But.. raw meat does not entice me, unless properly marinated first."

"I could chew it for you," Thomas offers and snaps his jaws at the woman. He then just settles down next to the meat and starts tearing off strips and actually eating it. "You take what you can get, sometimes."

"I'm not yet that desperate," Redmane notes. "And that sentiment is one I hope to disabuse these people of. It isn't enough to just survive. That is only suitable for animals."

"I've eaten worse," Thomas notes, though he doesn't exactly eat much of it. Sitting back up, he looks at the woman. "I do not know how much I can help you," he admits, head lowering slightly and ears splaying. "But if they try to harm you..." he adds slowly by drawing back his lips into a snarl.

"I may require something... difficult... of you, Thomas," Redmane notes, quietly. "If I can convince them to send an emissary to the Royal Court, then you will likely need to remain here as a hostage to ensure my loyalty."

The reply to that is the wolf laying his head lightly in Redmane's lap. "I trust you," he says, "That would be a small thing."

"From the guard, it sounds as if they've decided to either turn me into a wolf, or have me for lunch," Redmane notes. "I've only one means left to change their minds, and I do not know if it will work, or condemn me further in their eyes."

"For what it may be worth, if you offered to become part of the pack, it may sway their opinions and perhaps make them listen more to what you have to say," Thomas offers, "Willingness to see the world through their eyes. But then, you would be as I am now."

"And it would not solve the situation we and they are in," Redmane notes. "Still, if the judgement I seek goes against me, I will have to submit."

"Are you afraid?" Thomas asks by looking up at the woman with those yellow-green eyes.

"Not yet," the woman says, leaning against the wall. "That's one emotion I haven't fully recovered yet. Give it time."

"I did not know you were missing emotion," Thomas notes as he lifts his head from her lap and looks to the door. His ears flick.

"My upbringing was harsh, Thomas," Redmane admits. "It.. didn't leave much room for such things. The only one that mattered was anger, back then."

"You know loneliness, though. And friendship," Thomas points out. "My upbringing was ... well, nothing you would care about."

"It drove you into the wilds," the knight notes. "That's telling enough."

The wolf's head rolls back and those eyes peer at Redmane. "I am alone," the look somehow says. The wolf now goes to claw at the door to indicate to the guards he's done eating.

Redmane purses her lips, and then turns towards the door.

Bolts slide and the door eases open. "Come," the guards outside bark. Again Thomas looks back to Redmane. An expression of worry? Hard to tell before he heads from the room with a slight limp.

The woman follows along, watching the guard.

The guards look more tired than aggressive as they lead Redmane and Thomas back to the cathedral. There's no time to admire the decor this time as the pair are ushered inside. Once they reach the central room, Thomas is lead off to the side by a couple wolves. Whenever he looks back to the woman, they growl at him. Redmane is prodded towards the center of the circle again.

The Circle of the Fallen
Once a great cathedral to an ancient Goddess, this room has become the den of the elders. The center of the great room is an immense, smooth-stone floor. Once it must have been brightly polished marble with granite inlay ... but now it is dull, a shadow of its former self. A half-circle of granite is placed flush in the floor ... no, the symbol of the crescent moon.

Off to the sides and in the shadowy corners of the great room, many of Cerridwen's children wait to hear the judgment that will be passed down upon the knight. Some are in wolf form while others are not...and it is in one of these corners that Redmane sees a familiar face framed by silver-black hair: Erzsebet. Her yellow eyes follow the knight's movements closely, showing worry and doubt and even a little fear.

Redmane strides into the hall, and stops at the center next to the granite crescent. "Have you decided to do the right thing, and release those you've taken from their true families?" she asks.

The room is as quiet as a tomb as the old woman from the night before she strides out slowly into the circle. "We discussed your fate, child of the sea. The others are already part of our tribe and in time will be happy here," she says quietly.

Redmane clenches her teeth, and says, "I know now of December's treachery, elder. But you must see that taking his people only plays into his hand. It makes his side of the story that much more believable to the other Lords, and soon it will give him the authority he needs to take drastic measures against you. There is still time to stop this. Release them, and come with me to the Royal Court. Reveal the Lord of December's treachery, and your people will be saved."

The old woman shakes her head slowly. "And why would the other fey care? The world abandoned us, child of the sea. You of all people should know that. Have the fey ever showed you any true kindness? Have they ever welcomes you, other than for what skill you may bring?" she asks.

"Some have," Redmane notes. "It is enough. I beg you, do not continue with this blasphemy, for it leads to your doom."

There are rumbling growls that echo around the room. After a minute, the elder lifts her hand and the muttering silences. "Would you be so sure of those words if you were one of us, child of the sea?" the woman asks, "Would you still be willing to seek out their aide clothed in fur and claw? Ready to face their fear and hatred?"

"I've already done so in my own skin," the knight counters. "But if it is Cerridwen's will, I will accept it. Can you prove to me it is Her will, elder? Or shall I prove it myself, one way or the other?"

"Choose to join us and we will hear your council with new ears. For if you believe in what you say, then by offering yourself to us, you show the conviction in your heart," the elder says. Again, rumblings start growing around the chamber, but are silenced quickly by a unusually feral bark from the old woman. "I spoke last evening that you would not leave our home on two legs, child. We cannot risk betrayal. Not again."

Redmane unties her cloak and lets it drop to her feet. "Forgive me, elder, but I need to know if such a thing is... proper," she says. With the cloak gone, she's free to draw out her steel-bladed sword. "This is Morrighan the Crone, consecrated to the third aspect of Cerridwen; the Goddess of Death. I have pledged to the goddess that it will only strike down evil. If I strike the crescent and it leaves no mark, then I will know your actions are sanctioned by Cerridwen. If the granite should break, however, then it tells me you are committing a blasphemy. Either way, I will still submit to the transformation. But the truth will be known beforehand."

"How dare she claim ... " growls a voice from the shadows. Claws all around start scraping on the stones, approaching Redmane. "Cerridwen long abandoned these halls and our people," the elder says, face falling from a long-forgotten pain of being left behind. Her gaze then looks around the circle and the scraping stops. Even old, she still commands much in these halls, it seems. "So, even if the stone breaks, what would it matter? Strike, if you must."

"If it breaks, then perhaps you will know why She left you," Redmane states, and holds her sword point down with both hands as she stands over the crescent. Closing her eyes, she raises it up, and whispers, "You have never led me astray, Morrighan. Ease my conscience in this too." Then she brings the blade down with all of her strength.

The blade hits stone with the sound of thunder upon the floor and in a shower of sparks. Within her hand, the blade hums darkly, a dirge Redmane has known far too well from so many battles. As the hum fades, Redmane and the others find the tip of the steel blade buried deep into the granite crescent. Splintering out from the edge of the blade, cracks flow, bisecting the once solid moon in two.

The knight lets go of the sword, letting it stand there. "As I feared," she says, and steps back from it. "Well," she tells the elder. "Now that that is settled, are you ready to make me part of your pack?"

The elder stares long at the blade sunk into the old floor. Her eyes draw away from the blade and back to Redmane as she asks, "Then, do you give yourself of your own free will? Will you shed civilization and become part of the land? If you accept us, then remove your trappings of the fey."

Redmane begins removing her armor and her clothes, but says, "I will not shed civilization, elder. I have fought too hard to leave behind the animal in me. The strength of the sea is in my bones, and the fire of destruction is in my blood. I cannot let those have free reign over me again."

The elder says no more. Instead, she turns and walks from the circle. All from the shadows wolves step forward, taking up position around Redmane. They watch her with stony yellow eyes. To her left, there is a sudden growl, then movement towards Redmane. It's cut short by a pained yelp and a hard thud against the ground.

As the knight stares at the wolves surrounding her, she notices that Erzsebet has not moved from her corner to join them. Instead, she stands half-turned away from the circle, with her head bowed and her eyes squeezed tightly shut.

Once bare, Redmane crouches down on the broken floor. "Time to see how much I take after great-uncle Fenrir, I suppose," she says with a smirk, scanning around to see if any others turn away like Erzsebet.

The source of the yelp a moment earlier becomes obvious enough. The bandaged Thomas nas been tackled by two wolves while he was in mid-sprint towards Redmane. Under their weight, he cannot move, but his yellow-green eyes watch Redmane. The meaning is clear enough, he's afraid for Redmane.

"Thomas, help me best by keeping me from turning back into a monster," Redmane whispers towards the pinned wolf.

And in truth, about half of the enclave have turned, not wishing to watch this again. The ones that do watch arch their heads back. Like a coming storm, their howl starts soft, but grows with intensity. The ground beneath Redmane grows warm and her skin starts crawling, pinpicks creeping across her.

The Strength of the Sea is in my bones, Redmane recites in her head. The Fire of Destruction is in my blood. These are my birthrights. I am a giant, and they cannot be taken from me.

The strange feeling only lasts so long, though, before pain burns with fire inside her. Redmane can feel her spine twist and flex in her back as it pushes upward, causing her back to arch and curl. Her skin starts to ripple and roll as it stretches and shifts all along her arms. There are points when it's pulled so tight it feels like it's going to split. As her bones begin to realign in her arms and legs, she can hear and feel the wet snapping. No matter how much she might try and resist it, her fingers bend unnaturally, pulling under, crackling as they re-align themselves as well.

There's a soft whimper from Thomas as he watches his friend's body twist; the memories of just how it felt still quite fresh in his mind.

She growls but tries not to cry out from the pain. Memories of her battles in the Undying Lands flood her: being burned, filled with arrows and shedding rivers of blood - but not dying. Never able to die on those battlefields, despite the pain.

The pain Redmane feels now rivals the agony she felt in those days long past. The base of her spine ignites with a new agony as spurs of bone tear from her skin and stretch out behind her, then rapidly being covered with new muscle and flesh. Her skin tingles and burns as black and red fur explodes in patches all along her body. Her rib-cage feels as if it's being crushed, the sternum pressing outward as the sides collapse in. Her chest draws in, the flesh flattening to her ribcage. Even her mouth is on fire as teeth twist and extend all the wile she can feel an agonizing stretch of her jaw and nose outward.

There is no holding back the roar from Redmane's burning lungs. Mother said we were destined to burn the world at the end of time, some small part of her mind recalls. To sire gods and monsters. Is the world burning around me now?

As the fires burn within her, her ears and nose are assaulted. Intense scents flow in her, she can smell each of the wolves around her and how distinct they each are. She can ear their hearts beat and their breath as they draw it. All the wile, what little of the world she now sees becomes a wash of paler colors, everything fading to shades of white, gray, slight reds, and light blues. The floor soon rushes up to meet her when her arms and legs finally buckle beneath her. Her face hurts so much, it feels like any moment her skull is going to tear through that skin as it stretches forward. Even though the change lasts only minutes, if feels almost like hours. When the agony does slowly recede, it is never quite fast enough. In time, her vision returns, though it swims before her. Two paws lay stretched before her on the floor, covered in black fur and lightly tinted red fetlocks.

With an effort, Redmane forces herself to her feet, and looks at those surrounding her. She gauges the reaction to her new form by their scents.

The scents are strong. Nearly overpowering. There is a mix of satisfaction from some. Sorrow from others. While the pack seemed to stand in solidarity in this when she was on two legs... she can now tell there is quite a mix of feelings on this; with some obviously feeling it very wrong. Thomas scent is now strong here too; a mix of the wild and sorrow, with an odd undercurrent to it. It takes a moment to attach meaning to it, Thomas desperately wants to help her and protect her.

Before she can take her first steps within the circle, however, Redmane feels a rush of movement behind her. When she turns her lupine head towards it, she watches Erzsebet drop to both knees and place her body in between Redmane's and those of the other wolves. "Let me be the one to care for her and teach her our ways," she says aloud, presumably to the unseen elders. "As she is new to our pack and I have lost my former place, who better to do this task than one who shares her rank?"

"And what is my rank?" Redmane grumbles, not really addressing it to anyone in particular.

The elder gives Erzsebet a peculiar look. "You wish to take this one as your cub, then? To teach her the ways of the wild?" she asks softly. "So be it. But know that any shame she brings the pack she also brings upon you."

Erzsebet cants her head towards the newest member of her tribe. "The lowest rank there is," she tells the ruddy wolf quietly. "Omega."

The wolf-woman then bows her head to the elder and replies, "I understand. Thank you for allowing this."

"I don't have time to waste groveling," Redmane notes to Erzsebet. "Who do I have to kill to advance?"

There's another minor commotion off to Redmane's side and in a rush, the bandaged Thomas is beside her. Well, one thing can be said about Redmane's new form ... Thomas is now actually bigger than she is. "Muirenn?" he asks carefully, muzzle dipping down to gently nudge under her chin.

"Not in front of the pack" Redmane whispers to Thomas. "I'm fine, for now. So long as I maintain control."

Thomas draws back a few steps, though he continues to watch her, worried.

Erzsebet takes note of Thomas' appearance in the circle but does not say anything about it as he seems content to just watch them both and not interfere. "I will take her now to my home within our city," she tells the elder, then lowers her head to the level of Redmane's. "We will talk of challenges later and certainly not here," she whispers to her. "Are you able to walk?"

Redmane tries taking a few steps to test her legs. "Well enough, I suppose," she replies.

Thomas prances back and forth slowly, looking ready to move should Redmane start to tip.

The wolf-woman stands also and nods to the ruddy wolf at her side. "Then follow me...and you may as well come along, too, tracker," she adds to Thomas. "I promise that no harm will come to you in my home." With that, she strides out of the circle and forces the crowd of wolves to part for them.

"I'll be back for my sword later," Redmane tells the other wolves as she follows after Erzsebet.

Thomas looks to Redmane one more time, then walks after Erzsebet as well. When they are out of the circle and walking back outdoors, he finally asks the former-knight, "Are you okay?"

"Everything is sore," Redmine replies out of the side of her mouth. "But time is short. I need to meet with the other Omegas as soon as I can."

"Do not feel you have to do everything yourself," Thomas notes, "And do not think you can fight your way out of this, either. You can barely walk."

"I'm not about to get into any fights I can't win, Thomas," Redmane promises, her tone becoming more friendly. "I just want to raise an army."

"Going to overthrow the leaders, are you? Sowing chaos?" Thomas asks, leading over to bump Redmane lightly. "Not very knightly, that."

"Not chaos," Redmane says, with a feral grin. "Civilization."

"I knew there was a reason I liked you," Thomas comments.

The wolf-woman leads the other two through the crumbling city until they reach a narrow street lined on both sides with low, stone buildings in a rather sad state of disrepair. After another minute of following along this road, Erzsebet walks up to the very last one on the left. Without a word, she opens the cracked wooden door to the building and gestures for the two wolves to go inside.

Redmane sniffs first, to see if any others live here with Erzsebet.

The scent of the wolf-woman is everywhere within and the strongest one by far...but there is another, much fainter scent that Redmane is able to pick up, as well. It is also a very old one, as if its owner hasn't been in the house in a long time.

Redmane gets a polite 'nip' on her tail from Thomas to get her to go in. "Sorry, instinct," he claims, tongue lolling out in a playful grin.

The black-and-red wolf snorts at the nip, but goes inside.

Thomas follows along. "A nice tail, indeed, but I preferred you the other way," he comments as he enters behind Redmane.

"I can't say I care for being.. petite," Redmane grumbles, and sits down in a corner.

The house itself is all on one level and its rooms are not large. There are no decorations on the bare white walls or around the windows, but a few animal-skin rugs lie on the floors. Erzsebet goes immediately into the room that must serve as the main living area, for she kneels before its small fireplace and begins loading wood into it from the stack of logs kept nearby. "I'll have this going in a few minutes, so rest where you like," she tells the wolves over her shoulder as she works.

"Now, that part I don't mind so much," Thomas notes with another lopsided grin.

"At least they still have fire," Redmane says, sounding a bit more perky. "Erzsebet, you do know that I will not fall in line, don't you?"

"She is likely counting on it," Thomas notes.

Erzsebet takes a flint and tinderbox from the wooden mantle above the fireplace and gives Redmane another of her fangy smiles. "Just as I did not fall into line with the elders' wishes?" she notes wryly. "Yes, I am aware of this - and I did hear you tell the tracker of your intention to raise an army. This we must discuss once the fire is lit."

"I do not plan violence," Redmane promises. "Just to show that being civilized means more than just surviving. And the first rule of civilization is that the strong protect the weak. So, we need to let the weak know that."

"Unfortunately it is more often the strong bully the weak. Rarely is it protect," Thomas notes grimly. "But, perhaps this time can be different."

"We need to find the right bully to start with," Redmane suggests, resting her head on her forepaws. "One whose peers will not be eager to aid. A real jerk."

"Angryff," Thomas notes wryly as he flops on his side and rolls on his back, feet sticking up in the air. "The one who lead the group that beat on me."

"I know that one," Redmane says, lifting her head just to nod. "We'll watch him."

It takes some time, but at last Erzsebet gets the fire lit and warmth begins to fill the long-abandoned room. "Now that's done, I can do this..." The wolf woman trails off and very soon, her wolf form replaces her female form and she stretches out between the other two. Much better...and less of a chance of anyone overhearing my woman's voice.

"Who would spy on us?" Redmane has to ask.

"Subdue the mouth of a mob, and the mob falls," Thomas comments as he wiggles his toes in the air. "But, and I do have to point out, unless you learn to fight tooth and claw, Redmane ... it is unlikely you could defeat him in a challenge of dominance."

Erzsebet turns surprised yellow eyes to the ruddy wolf. You have seen how the others of our pack treat me because I do not agree with the elders' decision, and yet you ask this?

"I didn't think the others sophisticated enough to spy is all," Redmane notes. "I do not intend to challenge Angryff. I intend to overpower and humiliate him. I need him to lose status, and then to protect him when his former friends turn on him because of it."

"You want to be his hero? That is twisted, Redmane," Thomas notes.

"I want the message to get around that nobody can be victimized - regardless of station," Redmane asserts. "We'll start with the Omegas, because the receive the brunt of the abuse. But they aren't the only ones - even the higher ranks will get kicked by those at the top."

Let us just say that some are motivated to be more sophisticated than the others, Erzsebet replies. As for even trying to overpower Angryff, you will need to know how to use this new form to your best advantage. Right now, you are completely unused to it and would likely make mistakes. If you wish, I could help you with that.

"I had hoped we could all jump him together," Redmane admits, wagging her tail. "But learning to fight will certainly help. I'm not used to being so disadvantaged."

"And the end goal of that plan, is...?" Thomas asks as he rolls back over to his stomach. "Though, even I must admit learning to fight in this body would have advantages."

"Civilization, Thomas," Redmane notes. "It is key that people feel safe from simply being physically abused. It is a fear that keeps one thinking like an animal."

Then if you wish us to move as one, you both must learn what this form can do, Erzsebet tells them, including Thomas in her stare. I cannot make up for the untrained maneuvers of everyone in my family!

"We're ready to learn, 'Mom'," Redmane says, grinning.

"I don't spend much time around people," Thomas points out to Redmane. The comment on family gets Erzsebet an odd look. "We're your family now?"

Erzsebet makes a sound deep within her chest, one that is mixed with equal parts amusement and irritation. Did you not hear what the elder said? I have taken Redmane as my adopted pup...and you, as well, since you agreed to follow us, she adds to Thomas. As long as you remain with the pack, I am responsible for the pair of you.

"Then I should apologize now. I am not exactly known for being a good 'family member'," Thomas says rather honestly to Erzsebet. "But, given the issues at paw, as it were ... I will try to behave."

"I'll make sure he keeps out of trouble," Redmane promises, wagging her tail. "Or at least remembers not to get caught." She hardly listens to her own words, though, as her mind begins to plot. It won't be easy to get the wolves to give up being afraid of one another, but it's a necessary first step. Take away the fear, and they'll have more room for thinking..

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This site serves as a chronicle of sessions in an online roleplaying campaign moderated by Conrad "Lynx" Wong and May "Rowan" Wasserman. The contents of this site are (c) 2001, 2002 by Conrad Wong and May Wasserman except where stated otherwise. Despite the "children's fantasy" theme of this campaign, this site is not intended for young readership, due to mild language and violence.