Moz Ezley Asylum

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I Am The Very Model Of A Savanite In General
A parody of Gilbert & Sullivan's famous song from Pirates of Penzance.
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I wrote this off the top of my head immediately following the comment
which inspired the first verse. It's probably woefully inaccurate, but
it's intended to be fun, not serious. Enjoy!

A MIDI of the melody is available: 
http://diamond.idbsu.edu/GaS/pirates/p13.mid

- Buran

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SAVANITE (signing):

I am the very model of a Savanite in general
I've information vegetable, animal and mineral
I know captains of Rephidim and I quote the fights historical
From Chronotopia to Lamu in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters financial
I understand equations, both useless and economical
About the Bazaar and Darkside I'm teeming with a lot o' news
With many cheerful facts about the best places to buy fabric blue.

ALL (Acolyte Chorus):

With many cheerful facts about the best places to buy fabric blue.
With many cheerful facts about the best places to buy fabric blue.
With many cheerful facts about the best places to buy fabric blue.

SAVANITE:

I'm very good at dusting floors and ceilings and under things
I know the best tools to use to keep my master's house very clean
In short, in matters musical, practical, and mineral
I am the very model of a Savanite in general.

ALL:

In matters musical, practical, and mineral
He is the very model of a Savanite in general.

SAVANITE:

I know our mythic history: the Temple and the Astromancer
I know esoteric trivia, I've taste for wine in decanters
I quote in elegiacs all the expeditions of Bassai the Naga
In the kitchen I can outcook the Master-Slave Sifaka

I can translate a story from Vykarin pops and rattle-hums
I know the naval strategies used to make sure a battle's won
Then I can score a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore
And sign to you all the treaties leading to the Rephidim-Babel War

ALL:

And sign to you all the treaties leading to the Rephidim-Babel War
And sign to you all the treaties leading to the Rephidim-Babel War
And sign to you all the treaties leading to the Rephidim-Babel War

SAVANITE:

Then I can write a washing bill in proper Office of Review form
And tell you ev'ry detail of airship captain uniforms
In short, in matters musical, practical, and mineral
I am the very model of a Savanite in general.

ALL:

In short, in matters musical, practical, and mineral
I am the very model of a Savanite in general.

SAVANITE:

In fact, when I know what is meant by "processing" and "covert op"
When I can tell at sight a crossbow bolt from a Zelak cop
When such affairs as cooking lunch and playing cards I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely what is meant by "Temple simply must have that"
When I have learnt what progress has been made in airship design
When I know how to rate the body and fruitiness of wine
In short, when I've a smattering of Temple etiquette, you see
You'll say a better Savanite slave has never been than me.

ALL:

You'll say a better Savanite slave has never been than me.
You'll say a better Savanite slave has never been than me.
You'll say a better Savanite slave has never been than me.

SAVANITE:

For my knowlege of household things, though I'm brighter than a lantern, sir
Begins only with the reign of the last Captain-Astromancer
But still, in matters musical, practical, and mineral
I am the very model of a Savanite in general.

ALL:

But still, in matters musical, practical, and mineral
I am the very model of a Savanite in general.
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